For my Daily Practice I thought of applying a design intervention that causes me visceral (and maybe cultural) discomfort, with the purpose of enlightnening my current train of thought against neoliberalist practices. As an introvert, I thought I could start doing daily small “interviews” to people, just asking something like “What do you think is one of the things we need as a society to solve the big problems in the world?” – a big question, but that maybe could have short answers that I could record with my mobile phone.
Even when I thought of the idea from Day 1, the anxiety (and frustration) has been high during all these days, and I haven’t been able to start. Even if I rationalize it and think that I don’t have anything to lose, that in ITP I have a safe environment for experimenting, that normally people would be happy to answer even when recorded, “the thing”, “this thing”, however we can call it, stops me. I know I shouldn’t feel bad when thinking that for other people this would be extremely easy. And I don’t feel as bad because of that, I just feel frustrated that many days have gone by already and I haven’t been practicing.
I can see that this might be an issue of having a bigger goal than what is appropriate for me for the moment. I have been thinking in downsizing it but I’m not completey sure how. I have thought of doing just the recordings of myself talking, like the short “radio program” that will eventually have guests. Now that I write about it, I see that I can actually write and talk about these issues of self-doubt related to introversion. Maybe starting today with this text?
The Daily Practice statement would be, then: I’m interested in understanding and embracing self-doubt, especially when related to introversion and social awkwardness. A small approach that I can take, that for me requires discomfort in the visceral and cultural dimensions, is to write and read aloud daily a report of some example that caused me this kind of self-doubt, and to do it in English. The online documentation will consist in a small text along with its corresponding audio file.